i feel tat i'm such a bastard now.
i suddenly rmb the core mission of my blog.
i had created tis blog wif my sec sch frens in mind.
they are the ones who persuaded mi into getting one,
so they can know wad's going on wif mi and my life.
jus tis simple reason.

but i'm so obssessed wif my own life recently,
tat i onli blog and din read my frens' blog.
when i finally did today,
i realised i'm so behind time and when my fren was feeling so down,
i'm captured in my own world of fantasy.

sorrie simin.
u blog on 13th april and i onli read it today on 17th april.

actualli i dun wanna to blog abt tis,
becos my mei mei will read tis and feels bad abt it.
but after reading simin's entry,
i feel tat i must take the cue.
peiyi, dun tink too much after reading again.

last sunday,
i finally got to sit down and ate wif my family after like 2 weeks of not being at home.
i was so excited when i was walking home.
"yay! finally can eat tgt as a family!"
den i was visualising everyone was at home,
dinner was cooked and was waiting fer mi to start dinner.
cos it was almost 7 when i was reaching home.
but den,
when i got home.
dinner is not done,
mum was not backed yet.
cold.
and becos i was hungered since morning,
my mood changed drastically.
when everything finally settled down.
nth seems rite.
not an enjoyable meal after all.
becos everyone ate so fast.
as usual,
mum will leave the extra food to kor and mei,
leaving mi out, etc etc.
if i take sth, it shd not be the best one.
it must go to someone else.
it always happened tat when i took tis food and mum will go :"eh eh eh! why u take tat one? u take tis one."
u can imagine wad i got.
u know, tat kind of biasness?
den daddy came to my mind again,
and tears got locked at my eyes while i ate my dinner.
i jus kept quiet and i dun even feel like arguing back.
tis kind of thing happened so frequently tat the feeling became so familiar.
but i'll jus live wif it.
there's nth i can do to change her attitude.
and if she ever changed,
it means either one of my sibilings will take over my role.
so, no nid.

simin, my dear.
things tat u cant change,
u jus live wif it.
other things tat u can help wif,
jus try ur best.
leave ur dad alone.
i tink taking care of ur mum is a much easier task den changing ur dad.
dun even argue wif him.
jus ren.

and tis song is dedicated to u, simin!
smile! =)

p.s. actualli i was habing a super bad feeling last week tat sth is wrong wif u cos we din contact fer so long.
sorrie. i din take the instinct seriously.
i'm so sorrie.

Keep Holding On - Avril Lavigne

You're not alone
Together we stand
I'll be by your side, you know I'll take your hand
When it gets cold
And it feels like the end
There's no place to go
You know I won't give in
No I won't give in

Keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Just stay strong'
Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you
There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through

So far away
I wish you were here
Before it's too late, this could all disappear
Before the doors close
And it comes to an end
With you by my side I will fight and defend
I'll fight and defend
Yeah, yeah

Keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Just stay strong'
Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you
There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through

Hear me when I say, when I say I believe
Nothing's gonna change, nothing's gonna change destiny
Whatever's meant to be will work out perfectly
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you
There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through

Keep holding on
Keep holding on

There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through