In 2008,

I failed to juggle work, studies, friendships and family efficiently.
The reason is obvious. I am too into my new uni life.
I seemed to have fare badly in all areas in the end.
Lost my friends, poor results and I am sinking into financial crisis.
You may be laughing at me now.
Shaking your head, and think that maybe you can do better if you were me.
Good for you then.

For this entire year, I have been living in total self-denial.
Whenever sth goes wrong, i gave myself excuses.
Keep convincing myself that it was unavoidable that the wrong happened.
I was like a mouse, too timid to face my flaws.

I have learnt.
That i must not be ambitious but do things within my limit.
That all humans are selfish and it includes family and friends. Selfless is non-existent.
That I should gladly accept help rendered by others, but still be dependent on myself for things that i can do.
That time won't heal a bleeding heart. It will only stop hurting when someone comes around to give you a new heart.
That i really can't be a flial daughter and forgive my mum for everything she's done and still doing. I only love my Dad and can only be filial towards him.
That the most heartfelt gratitude/apology do not need to be spoken words.

I dun wanna make any new year's resolution this year.
I'm not in the mood today.
I will just see how it goes.

P.S. i haben quite recover from my depression.